A winning attitude is critical to Life on Your Terms. I learned this firsthand 15 years ago, following a diving accident. Doctors told me that it would be impossible to live independently, but I refused to give up on my dreams.

Attitude, of course, is not like a light switch you can simply switch on or off. It's easy to start the day with the right attitude, and then easily and quickly find yourself slipping into the wrong attitude. As the legendary Henry Ford once said, "Whether you think you can or you think you can't, you're right!" I totally agree. The minute you say you can't do something, you put up roadblocks and stop yourself. The minute you say you can do it, you set yourself on the path of possibility. Now, I am not saying that an empowering attitude alone will get something done -- action is required -- but believing is a great start.

"Attitude" is one of those words that evokes a wide variety of definitions. For that reason, I won't even try to give you an all-encompassing definition of the word "attitude." I would, however, like to share with you the three key components of my attitude.

You are capable of doing more than you ever expected. I know you have probably heard those words of encouragement from parents, teachers and coaches, perhaps so often that you now consider that statement a meaningless cliche. I'm here to tell you that this statement is absolutely true. Fifteen years ago following that life-changing diving accident, doctors told me I was a quadriplegic, that I would never be able to walk again, and that I would never be able to dress myself or even put on my own shoes. I now realize that prior to those conversations with the doctors, urging me to be "realistic," I had no idea what I was truly capable of. Those discouraging conversations with the doctors somehow gave me a new resolve. At that point, I promised myself that even though this accident changed my life, I wouldn't for a second let it change what I wanted for my life. I have made good on that promise. I am living the life I always imagined I would live - not just in pursuing my dreams of living independently, marrying and starting a family, and succeeding in the business world - but also in regaining an amazing degree of physical mobility.

Believe in yourself! As I tell audiences when I'm speaking about attitude, "Anything I can do, you can do." I don't have an extra "I-can-beat-adversity" chromosome. I do believe, however, that the difference between people like myself who have overcome seemingly insurmountable odds and those who don't is that we believe in ourselves. We listen to that small, faint, even fleeting voice that says, "I think you can do this." No matter the odds, no matter what even friends and family are saying, trust your gut instincts. (Our friends and loved ones have a natural desire to "protect us from disappointment." After we've been through so much, they reason, they don't want us to experience the pain of falling short of lofty dreams.) Even if your gut isn't sure, go ahead anyway, even when it gets tough. Over the years, I have had a lot of people tell me that they couldn't do what I have done. Each time my response is, "How do you know? Have you ever sat across from a doctor and been told what I was told?" They answer "No," and I say again, "Then how do you know?" Don't take yourself out of the game before it begins!

It's your attitude and no one else's. I go to bed every night paralyzed, and every morning I get up just as paralyzed. I can't control that, but I can control my attitude towards my paralysis and towards each day. It is a beautiful thing that the most important tool in creating the life we desire is completely under our control.. Every day, we have a fresh chance to choose our attitude. I know quite well how few things each of us can control in our professional and personal lives, and the challenges and setbacks that affect each of us every day. Take control of what you can -- your attitude -- and see where it will take you! Even after a number of wise and well-intentioned doctors urged me to lower my expectations about life, my attitude has given me a chance to do everything I've ever wanted to do. You can too!

I'd love to hear how you have used a winning attitude to achieve success in business or your personal life! E-mail me your story, so I can share it in a future newsletter!
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I'm sure I'm not alone in saying that some of the most powerful professional and personal insights and ideas have come directly or indirectly from books. For that reason, in every one of my monthly newsletters, I'll be featuring one book that has made a major difference in my life. Most often, these books will be more applicable to your professional career than your personal life, but they'll have relevance to your personal life as well. I want to take his opportunity to really encourage you all to read and listen to books. As the motivational speaker Jim Rohn urges, "Feed your mind!" The statistics on how few books adults read once they leave college is scary, and I've been guilty of falling into that trap myself.

I read a little in college but then really stopped and didn't pick it up again until the last few years. Like so many of us, the tragic and horrendous events of 9/11 left a major impact on me. Following that tragedy, one realization came to me -- minor compared to the scale of that terrible incident, yet still very important. That realization was my rediscovery of the importance and satisfaction of reading. After weeks of feeling numb and walking around in some sort of funk, I began to think "I really don't remember much about how this incredible and wonderful country we live in began and our history." Now, I will admittedly never have a great memory for important historic dates and the details of decisive military battles. Following 9/11, I was hungry to be reminded of the indomitable spirit of my fellow Americans. I felt an irresistible urge to read about the strength of attitude and the commitment of people. At that time nearly seven years ago, I started to read a lot about the Founding Fathers, the drafting of the Constitution, the American Revolution, and then a huge event in early American history -- the Civil War.

After years of neglecting books, I had forgotten how books can open our minds to new ideas, and expand our perspective on the world. Reading has been a great addition to my life once again. With my appetite whetted, I dove back in and have been reading a lot in recent years, and listening to books in my car after dropping off the kids at school, getting a morning breakfast bagel and running errands. I can't emphasize how great books on CD have been in this process. It is great way to get the benefits of books you may not get a chance to read -- or books you're eager to read if only there were more hours in the day.

So with all that said, I recently read a great book, The Dip by Seth Godin who has written other books including The Purple Cow and The Big Moo. As an aside, I am currently listening to The Big Moo. I am really enjoying it, and I expect to share some thoughts on that book with you in a future newsletter. The Dip is a small (literally) quick read, approximately 75 pages in length, with easy to follow examples and short chapters. They are almost like excerpts. Godin doesn't overanalyze or spend pages and pages trying to spoon feed you the content. Instead, he lets you think about the premise of the idea and how to apply it to yourself and your situation without trying to connect every dot for you.

Now, for those of you who know me, it might be surprising to hear me talk about a book on quitting. However, this book talks about "strategic quitting." In a world where we are all so busy, pulled in so many directions, with competition coming at us from all sides and sides we never imagined even a year ago, we can't be all things to all people. We can't do all things we want to do professionally and personally and be everywhere at the same time. In this situation, maybe strategic quitting isn't such a bad idea.

The book wants you to succeed professional and personally -- to be the best. It doesn't teach you to be a quitter. It is much the opposite. It teaches you how not to quit and the importance of sticking it out, "gutting it out" through the dip. The dip "is the long slog between beginning and mastery." It is the time when, for example, the excitement of a new project has begun to wear off and you have to do the busy work like keying in email addresses, filing, opening every piece of mail just in case there is some new great lead in there, etc.

The book talks about quitting the wrong stuff, staying with the right stuff, and having the courage to do both. Too often, people quit when it gets too hard. (They quit, for example, when their first mail campaign didn't work. They say, "Why try again? I'll just forget it.") People also tend to stick when it is too inconvenient to quit. (They say, "If I quit now, what else will I do?") To be truly successful professionally and personally, quitting is a concept I never thought I would endorse. I didn't want to be labeled "a quitter" or perceived as a quitter. At the same time, I want to be successful in my professional career as well as my personal life, which means I will be following some of Seth Godin's advice and doing some quitting!

If you're thinking about quitting, and you are giving the idea the time and focus it truly deserves, then Godin has done his job. Before you decide it's time to quit something or not, ask yourself these three questions from his book:

Am I panicking?

Who am I trying to influence?

What sort of measurable progress am I making?

You will have to read The Dip to understand why these questions are so important.

If you would like to recommend a business book that you'd like to see featured in a future newsletter, please e-mail your suggestion!
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Effectively managing a career - especially one of steady growth, with frequent promotions - has always been a challenge, but it's important to remember that no one will manage your career for you. The days when you could blindly place the future of your career in the hands of the company, and put your faith in the idea that "If I work hard and show up every day, I'll get my turn" are long gone.

Now more than ever, managing your career is up to you and it's still not easy -- whether you're just starting out in the workforce, you're in mid-career, or even if you work for a company experiencing the turbulent waters of a merger or acquisition. The post-millennium "workplace" encompasses countless trends and companies of every size and every industry, which makes it difficult to offer general advice.

Nevertheless, as someone who not long ago ran an internal career advisory service for a Fortune 500 company for a number of years and just went through the turbulence of an acquistion, I can share some fundamentals with you that will make successfully managing your career much easier. While career management trends continue to change, these essential fundamentals don't.

By focusing on these fundamentals, you will be building a solid foundation for your career. If you make these principles an ongoing part of your job, you'll be taking charge of your own future, and effectively moving in the direction of that next promotion or job.

Share your goals with your manager and director. Don't assume your boss knows your career goals. This may come as a surprise, but it's not their job to get you promoted or to help you land your next job. They can and should steer you in the right direction for career growth, but it is ultimately up to you to drive your own career. In most cases, of course, you are not the only person your boss is responsible for.

Focus on your current job. Like it or not, the recurring mantra of the business world seems to be, "What have done for me lately?" As a former manager myself, I can tell you from firsthand experience that I quickly grew very tired of hearing an employee tell me how great he would perform in his next job, especially if he was only an average performer in his current job. Instead, focus and work on your current position.

If you excel at your current position, you are in a much better position to handle your next job effectively. I know that may seem pretty basic but you might be surprised how often it happens. There is a difference between responsibly telling your manger your long-term career goals, and continually explaining how great you would be in that other job while you struggle or even neglect the responsibilities of your current position -- even if you're not motivated by this job.Get motivated because that is how you will get that next job.

Where do you fit in? The people I was motivated to help land their next promotion or sought-after jobs were the ones who saw the bigger picture. They didn't merely understand their position and how it fit into their department or division, but they saw how their decisions affected other departments, divisions and the company goals. It also increases my confidence that they could indeed handle the additional responsibilities and "bigger picture" thinking required at the next level.

Don't just be a top performer. There is nothing wrong being a top performer, and you should be proud of the accomplishment. The people who successfully land their desired promotion or job (especially a management job) did more than "hit their number," however. They helped the overall team's performance by doing things like mentoring new people on the team, sharing best demonstrated practices, and supporting their managers with their projects and responsibilities. Their actions demonstrated that they knew it wasn't about them but about the team, and they raised the overall performance of the team.

Know your next job. Make sure you really understand the position you seek to move into next. Really make sure you know the day to day responsibilities, hours, flexibility, financial data, personnel, and other details. When I was working in the corporate world, I can't tell you how many times people would tell me they wanted to go into marketing, for example, without doing much research on that type of job at that particular company. When I told them that a big part of a marketing jobis list and lead management, running test campaigns, and organizing direct mail projects, for example, they would look stunned. They had delusions of developing million-dollar global television campaigns.

I'm sure that if you keep these five principles in mind, and put them into practice, you'll be in a great position to land the promotion you're seeking. Also, if you'd like one-on-one coaching on achieving your desired career goals, I'd love to hear from you!

If you have a story to share about how you've used certain insights or strategies to succeed in your career, please e-mail with your story, so I can share it in a future newsletter!
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